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The Making of a Gigolo (14) - Erica Bradford
by Lubrican
Chapters : 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26
Chapter Seventeen
He opened the door to a bedroom and went in. The bed was
made, but he didn't pay much attention to the rest of the room, as he
went to the closet. He saw Will's suitcase on the floor, next
to three or four left shoes and hanging clothes that were for a
man. He turned and realized the room looked spare and only
partly furnished. He left and found another
bedroom. That closet had her robe in it ... and something
else that was odd. Clothes he had seen Will wear were hanging
up in the closet. There were two right shoes ... men's shoes
... on the floor.
With the robe over his arm, he surveyed the room. The bed had
not been made, though someone had made a half-assed attempt at putting
the bedspread in place. There were two pillows on that bed,
side by side, with depressions in each that suggested a head had rested
there.
He looked at the vanity. Her cosmetics - the few that she
apparently used - were neatly arranged. On one end were a
pile of safety pins and some Old Spice underarm deodorant. A
comb lay next to it that had a few brown hairs caught in the teeth.
Understanding leapt into Bobby's mind as he realized they slept in the
same bed. His mind twisted slightly, trying to imagine that,
but the evidence was obvious. He cautioned himself not to
jump to the obvious conclusion. He slept with his sisters
sometimes ... it wasn't difficult for him to imagine that some other
brother and sister did the same thing. At the same time, his
mind just would not accept that Will slept with his sister ... in the
same way Bobby did.
He shook his head. It was really none of his
business. But it did suggest why she might feel like she had
something to hide. Hiding things was hard on a person
sometimes.
He left the room, paying attention to the feel of his face.
He wanted to look calm ... normal ... when he took the robe to her.
She was still in the tub.
"Can you feel your fingers and toes?" he asked.
"Yes," she said.
"Okay, then. Here's your robe. I'll just put it
here." He laid it on the toilet seat. "You need to
get dry as quickly as you can and then you need to go to bed.
You should put on extra blankets because you need to stay warm."
"I'm not a child," she complained.
"Well sometimes you act like it." He frowned. "I'm
sorry. Never mind. I'll just leave now."
"Wait!" It was out of her mouth before she could stop
it. Even worse, she'd sat up and her breasts were out of the
water. She covered them with her left arm, which was a little
like trying to cover a couple of cantaloupes with a twelve inch ruler.
He turned back, waiting.
"Would you put the covers on for me ... once I'm in bed?"
She'd had to think of something to say, and that was the best thing she
could come up with. She admitted to herself that she just
didn't want him to leave yet. She didn't know what that
meant, but she had to acknowledge it.
He looked at her, and then tilted his head, as if he were examining her.
"All right," he said. "You want me to leave while you dry
off?"
"Of course," she said, blushing.
"I'll be right outside," he said.
She stood up as soon as the door closed, and felt the cool air
instantly. She felt fine now, but she knew she'd start
shivering any second, so she climbed out of the tub and started rubbing
at her skin briskly with a towel. She shrugged into her robe,
thankful that it was thick terrycloth. Her hair was wet and
she wrapped another towel around it. She was still barefoot,
but there was nothing she could do about that.
She looked at her clothes, scattered on the floor and bent to pick them
up. She tossed them in the hamper and then remembered to take
her billfold and comb out of the pants pocket. She took the
towel off her head and ran the comb through her hair.
She opened the bathroom door to find Bobby leaning against the wall,
with his arms folded. She walked past him to her bedroom,
stopping at the linen closet in the hall to pull out two
blankets. She handed them to him and went into her
room. She stood by the bed, shifting from foot to foot.
She obviously couldn't take her robe off with him in the room, so she
pulled back the covers and started to get into the bed.
"Don't wear that robe to bed," he moaned. "It's damp
now." He sounded like he was a frustrated parent, talking to
a balky teenager.
"I'm not taking this off with you in the room!" she said, almost loudly.
"Look," he said. "I just saw you in all your glory in the
bathroom. You seem to think that if I see your body, you'll
be soiled for life or some such nonsense. Just drop the robe
on the floor, climb into bed and pull the covers up, so I can put these
on you and go home, okay?"
She was stung that he was in such an all fired hurry to get away from
her. She was so distracted by that, that it never occurred to
her to just tell him to turn around while she took the robe
off. He was shaking out a blanket anyway, and didn't seem to
be paying any attention to her.
She untied the knot in the robe. She turned away from him and
let the robe slide off her shoulders. It fell in a heap and
she took the first step to dive for the bed, just as he said something that caught her completely by surprise.
"Do you want these all on your side, or some on Will's side too?"
She was so concerned about him seeing her naked that her reply was
automatic.
"Both."
Time stopped, at least for Erica Bradford. In fact,
everything stopped, except for her brain, which seemed to turn in a
somersault inside her head. Time then seemed to go in fits
and starts as she reacted to what had just happened. Her body
turned to face him, while her mind tried frantically to come up with
something for her to say ... anything to cover up what she had just
exposed.
He was no longer unfolding the blanket, but was looking at what else
was exposed ... mainly Erica's body.
"No!" she blurted. "That's not what I meant!"
"Get in bed, Erica," said the man who now held her future in his hands.
"No!" she said again, but she wasn't talking about what he had just
told her to do.
He stepped toward her and her eyes registered that his own eyes had
dropped to her breasts. His hands, still holding the blanket,
came toward her and it looked to her like a wall of cloth was about to
push against her. His hands, through the blanket, pushed at
her shoulders and she leaned toward the bed.
Then, suddenly, time started up again. The bed had assumed a
whole new importance in her life, but in a completely different
way. Now, instead of being a place of warmth and comfort, she
saw it as a place she could get into and hide in. She dove
for the sheets, her hand grabbing the covers. Within seconds,
she had pulled them over her head. She also started breathing
again, and realized she had been holding her breath.
He was still out there. The man who had unmasked her
perversion ... who knew the secret that had brought so much joy to her
brother and her, but which would now destroy them both.
She heard her own choking sobs before her mind realized she was the one
making the noises. Then all the emotion that had driven her
from Bobby's car, and into the frigid night, and everything that had
happened since then, swooped down to crush her. Her wail was
filled with a mix of frustration, anger, shame and disappointment that
her life had come to this maelstrom of disaster. Her knees
came up and she curled into a ball, as she cried her eyes out for
everything she had just lost.
The first external thing that registered in Erica's tortured mind was
the feel of something heavy sliding up and down her back. A
tiny piece of her consciousness examined that stimulus and categorized
it as a hand, on the outside of the covers, just moving from the base
of her neck to her lower back, and then back again. There was
something wrong with that, and that tiny piece of her consciousness
grabbed other brain cells and shook them, saying "Listen to
me! Something isn't right here!" Perhaps it's
pushing the analogy too far, but imagine with me some of those other
brain cells saying "Of course something's not right, you
idiot! Our incest has just been discovered!"
But that tiny piece of rationality insisted on being listened to and,
slowly, Erica's sobs tapered off to intermittent shuddering sniffs, as
the hand, which could only be the hand of Bobby Dalton, stroked her
back.
"It's all right, Erica," said a soothing bass voice.
No it wasn't! Nothing would ever be right again!
She was quite sure of that.
But now the external stimulus demanded more attention.
"It's all right," said the voice again.
Yet another upheaval wrenched her system, as she reached for the only
life preserver that seemed, somehow ... miraculously ... to have been
tossed near her. He wasn't laughing. He wasn't
crowing. He wasn't chuckling at how much fun it would be to
tell the world that the strident feminist slept with her own brother.
She reached for the covers and pushed them down off her head.
He was just sitting on the edge of the bed, his hand stroking her back.
"It's all right," he said again as she stared, unbelieving, into his blue
eyes.
The world turned again as he went on, speaking as if nothing unusual
had happened at all.
"Right now, you just need to concentrate on getting warm again, and
staying warm. Let me see your fingers."
She didn't understand. She pushed her hands out, beside her
face and he reached to touch each finger, squeezing them individually.
"I don't think you got frostbite," he said, casually. "How
are your toes?"
She wiggled them automatically. They felt fine.
"Okay ... I think," she said, sniffing between the okay and the rest of it.
"I don't want to let the heat out, but you need to check them," he
said. "Feel them and see if there is anything that feels too
firm, or feels painful when you squeeze it. If you actually
have frostbite, we need to get you to a hospital."
She went back under the covers and felt her feet and toes.
They felt completely normal. She stuck her head out of the
covers again.
"I think they're okay," she said, her voice a little stronger now.
He reached out and brushed her still damp hair away from the side of
her face.
"I'm going now," he said. "Stay in bed and stay warm."
"But ..." She stopped, unable to believe she was about to
bring it up again.
"I'll see you tomorrow."
Then, her world turned another few degrees as he leaned down, kissed
her forehead, and then got up and walked out.
While Erica went through her torture, her brother was going through
something that was almost diametrically opposed. Christy had
driven him to the Wagon Wheel, where they saw the crush of people.
"Oh my," she said, looking at the single cement step that she had never
paid any attention to in the past. "Can you hop up that step?"
"Yes," he said, "but I'm not sure it's worth it. The place is
already crammed."
"I have chocolate cake at home," she said. "I can make
coffee."
Will's mind wasn't used to dealing with evaluating this kind of
information. Other than Tilly and Jake, no one had invited
them anywhere. And this invitation wasn't for him and his
sister. A beautiful woman was suggesting he come to her
house. He couldn't wrap his mind around that. The
male in him ... the male he had been, and which Erica had helped
reawaken ... thought about it one way. His rational mind
laughed at that and tried to find some other reason she might make that
invitation.
"But if you want to go in, we can manage it," she went on.
"No." It came out of his mouth without conscious
thought. It flustered him a little. "It's too
crowded already," he said. "My chair takes up a lot of room."
"Want some cake?" she asked.
He twisted in the seat so he could look right at her. She was
just looking at him. She wasn't grinning. There was
no innuendo in her voice. His rational mind told him "It's
just an offer of a piece of fucking cake, moron!"
"Yes." That time his answer was intentional.
"Do you see Erica anywhere?" she asked. She looked past him,
peering through the front window of the diner. "Be right
back," she said.
She hopped out of the car, leaving it running, and ran into the
diner. He saw her talk to several kids and look
around. Then she spoke to Jimmy Conroy, who was sitting with
two girls Will knew only as Sarah and Vicky. All three turned
and looked through the window at the car and waved. Jimmy
nodded, and Christy came running back to the car.
"She wasn't in there," she said. "I asked some kids to tell
her where you went if they see her."
"Okay," said Will. Obviously she wasn't trying to keep it a
secret that she was taking him to her house. He wasn't sure
how to interpret that.
Getting him through the front door required that she step on a
projection on the back of the chair and raise the front
wheels. She didn't seem to have any trouble doing that,
though he heard her grunt as she lifted the bulk of his weight as the
rear wheels bumped up and over the threshold, which was raised about
three inches off the surface of the concrete slab that served as her
porch. She pushed him into the kitchen and helped him pull
his right arm out of his coat. She tugged the coat out from
behind him and draped it over the back of a kitchen chair
she'd removed so he could be pushed up to the table.
He watched as she shed her own coat, draping it over another chair
back. Then she nattered on about how seeing the show for the
second time was interesting, because she picked up nuances she hadn't
seen the night before, as she got the cake out and cut
slices. She plopped a plate and fork on the table in front of
him, and again asked if he wanted coffee.
"You have any milk?" he asked.
She did and soon they both had glasses of that. She sat down
and took a bite of her own cake.
He took his eyes off of her for perhaps the first time since they'd
arrived in the house, not counting the times she was behind him, and
looked around. It looked like any other kitchen, except for
the framed photographs on the walls. There were five or six
of them, and the subject matter varied from a landscape that had a
stream in it to a picture of a blond woman, wearing a cowboy hat and
holding a guitar on her lap. There was a black scrawl of what
looked like a signature in the bottom right corner of that picture.
Christy saw him looking at that picture.
"That's Misty Compton," she said around a mouthful of cake.
"She's a singer who did some concerts over in Hutch a while
back. I took her publicity shots. Country western. Have you ever
heard her?"
"I haven't gotten to listen to much music in the last few years," he
said.
That brought to both minds what he'd been doing the last few years, and
conversation lagged. Christy wondered what she was
doing. Ever since she'd met this man, she'd felt some kind of
tug. That she liked his personality was a
given. Anyone who could go through what he'd gone through,
and retain his sanity, had to be a strong person. But she had
no idea how to interact with a man who was clearly not on the same
playing field as all the other men she was acquainted with.
She remembered his sharp denial that he was interested in
pity. She did feel some pity for him ... some sadness at the
unrealized dreams he must have had ... but she didn't feel like that
was why he was sitting across her kitchen table from her. It
was less confusing to merely decide that she just liked him.
But what could they talk about? She didn't want to talk about
his troubles. He'd had enough of them to last several
lifetimes. They'd gone through the inane chatter that people
use to break the ice and learn a little about each other. She
could only think of one thing.
"Have you ever seen how pictures are developed?" she asked suddenly.
"Nope."
"Want to?"
Will's thought processes were somewhat similar to
hers. He wasn't sure why she was showing this interest in
him. He was pretty sure it wasn't anything a normal woman
would feel for a normal man. His sister showed that kind of
interest ... but that was different. He was
different. Like her, he didn't know what to say, or how to
move the conversation forward. He wasn't even sure if he
should move the conversation forward. She was beautiful and
he couldn't ignore that. She was a healthy, vibrant
woman. She'd been married. She had a child.
"Where's Jillian?" he asked, instead of answering her question.
"She's staying at Jill's tonight. She misses Steven, so we
try to let them do sleepovers once in a while." He looked
confused and she explained. "Jill and I used to live
together. We had our babies about the same time and she
worked for me. She still does, though she's gone part time
now that she got married. The kids grew up
together." She giggled. "Not that they're grown or
anything, but you know what I mean. When Jill got married,
Jillian lost her brother, sort of."
Will could understand how that would be traumatic. If he lost
Erica, he'd be devastated. He remembered her question.
"Sure," he said. "I'd love to find out how you do your magic."
He tried to change his mind when she announced that she'd take his
portrait, and then develop that.
"You can't be serious," he said.
She was almost instantly sorry she'd brought it up, but instinct made
her push ahead.
"Look," she said. "You are who you are. You got
those scars honestly. You fought your way back from death to
be in this world. Okay, you're in it. Now what are
you going to do ... hide?"
"But ..."
"Let me just see what I can do," she said. "I'm not promising
you'll like anything. Just let me take your picture."
He thought it was crazy, but he let her push him into her
studio. Then he sat, feeling more and more exposed, somehow,
as she walked slowly around him, stopping to stare before moving
on. He watched her face when he could see it. He
didn't see revulsion. Instead she looked like she was
examining some painting at a gallery, maybe ... just looking at it ...
and thinking about what she was seeing.
"We can go several ways," she said, finally. "I'm not sure
all of them will work."
What she was actually thinking was that she was pretty sure she could
do a profile portrait that would not show any of the damage.
In such a shot, he'd look completely normal. It could create
an image of what he might have looked like, if he hadn't been burned,
because the mind would fool the viewer into thinking that the parts
that didn't show were just as normal as what did. But that
could work in one of two ways. It could celebrate what had
been preserved ... or deepen the pain of his loss.
He expected her to leave him in his chair, but she didn't.
There was a low bench that could be covered with various materials, and
she posed him there, first. She used several
backdrops. He'd expected her to take a picture, and then it
would be over. Instead, she took shot after shot.
The flash bothered him, because it brought back memories of explosions,
but he was able to control his angst.
Then she had him stand, while she arranged a stool for him to half sit
on, in what looked like an alcove with three sides. She went
in a half circle while she took even more shots, from both sides and
the front. She stopped and looked at him.
"The scars go all the way down ... don't they." She was
looking at his left arm. He routinely pinned the long sleeve
on that arm closed, so his stump wouldn't show.
"Yes," he said, wondering what she was thinking.
"I'd like to try something. I just thought of it.
It's kind of ... radical."
"What?" he asked.
"I have a flag that I hang behind the officers of the VFW when I take
their official photographs," she said. "I'd like to wrap you
in it."
She stopped and looked nervous.
"I want to show the scars," she finally added.
Will just stared at her.
"Let me explain," she said, obviously nervous now. "I have
this image in my mind ... the warrior ... scarred while fighting for
his country. The flag represents how that country will hold
him ... care for him ... treasure him."
"Nobody treasures me," said Will immediately. He was thinking
of the endless bureaucracy he'd had to wade through to get
treatment. It was supposed to be automatic. A
doctor would decide what needed to be done, and then that was supposed
to happen. But it never went that smoothly. There
were delays, and sometimes his case was pushed aside.
Operations that were supposed to be two or three months apart were six
months apart. He'd spent countless hours just sitting,
waiting for something to happen, and then countless more hours alone in
a hospital bed, recuperating from their latest attempt to do
something. Those few nurses had cared about him ... but that
was all. He'd gotten a purple heart, but it had just been
handed to him, while he was in bed, by a nameless civilian who had only
said "Here, they awarded this to you."
"Your sister does," said Christy. "Your parents do."
"My parents are dead," he said.
"Oh." She struggled for something that would lift her stupid
idea out of the gutter. "I do."
He looked at her. "You don't treasure me," he said.
It was a statement of belief, and that was plain.
"Okay," she said, as she flushed bright red. "Maybe not
treasure. But I respect you, and I think you're brave and
strong. I'm part of America."
They argued about it for a while longer, until Will did what men have
done for centuries ... he gave in, just to get her to shut
up. That was fine until she returned with the flag and said
"Take off your shirt."
There was another argument then. Believe it or not, it is
possible for an argument to bring two people closer together
sometimes. It isn't really the substance of the argument that
does that ... it's the fact that both of them care enough to argue
about something, at least in situations like this. He was
sure she'd be horrified at seeing the scars on his torso, which were
worse than what usually showed, because that part of him had gotten a
heavier dose of napalm than his face, which had been somewhat shielded
by his helmet. She was just as adamant that scars were scars,
and that it didn't matter, except that the scars needed to show if her
idea was ever to become a reality.
In one sense, he was arguing "I want to protect you from something
disgusting," and she was arguing "I don't care if it's disgusting, it's
part of you and I accept you just like you are." That's the
kind of argument that can bring two people closer together, even if
they don't realize it's happening at the time.
Again, however, she eventually wore him down, and he gave in.
He expected her to gasp as he wiggled his bad arm out of the cloth, and
then used that arm to press and hold, so he could extract his good
arm. The stump was well-healed, with a smooth, normal skin
shade where the grafts had been used to cover it. The rest of
his arm, his shoulder, and his side were a thick, mottled almost bluish
red, crisscrossed with lines. He could have told her the
names of the scars, which were a mixture of keloid and contracture
scars that had interacted with the Langer's lines of tension on his
body, causing the separation of lumps of scarring. But the
technical jargon wouldn't mean anything to her. All she'd see
was ugly looking damage that made him look faintly reptilian, at least
to his own eyes.
She didn't gasp. She did tremble, as she saw the extent of
the damage, and how his elbow didn't bend quite as far as it
should. The scarring had robbed him of some of the mobility
in his elbow. His shoulder movement was almost normal, due to
the hours and hours of excruciatingly painful physical therapy they had
inflicted on him. They had worked his shoulder for him, and
had told him to work his own elbow. He hadn't spent as much
time doing that as he was supposed to, because of the pain, and the
scarring there was tight.
Her fingers held the flag just over his skin, preparing to drop it,
when she had a sudden thought.
"Is there pain? Will it hurt if I touch it?"
"Sometimes there are phantom pains," he said. "I can feel
things. It used to hurt all the time, but that's tapered
off. That's why I can wear a shirt."
"But I won't hurt you by doing this," she said.
"No."
She draped the flag over his shoulder, bunched so it lay between his
neck and the tip of his shoulder, which was visible. The
field of stars was crumpled on his sternum. She wanted his
stump across that, and had to decide whether to move it there herself,
or have him do it. She decided she needed to touch that skin,
if only to make herself do it. Her initial impulse was to use
just her thumb and one or two fingertips to do that, but she clamped
down on her discomfort and gripped the arm, just above the stump.
"Hold the flag against you like this," she said, positioning his
arm. She wasn't surprised that the skin was warm.
It looked hot, and felt rough and slick somehow, but it still felt like
skin.
She went behind him to pull the rest of the red and white bars around
his back, and draped it over his right shoulder, covering the good skin
there. She stood back, and then, like she had done before,
moved all the way around him, just looking at him from different
vantage points.
Then she picked up her camera.
"Lift your chin a little," she said, looking through the viewfinder.
The lights flashed and Will blinked.
"Now turn your head to the right a bit."
She walked all the way around him, taking photographs. She
stopped, removed the film canister from the camera and replaced it, and
kept going. She took shots both from a standing position,
and, in some cases, resting on one knee, looking up. Finally
she was satisfied. She helped him put his shirt back on,
somehow knowing that it needed to go on the bad arm first, and then
told him he could sit back down in his wheelchair.
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