PLEASE NOTE: This story is a preview of Lubrican's Fractured Fairy Tales - Volume Three. It is available for purchase in its entirety, which includes three other stories, via
Once upon a time there was a miller who was poor, but who had a
beautiful daughter. Now it happened that he had to go and speak to the
king, and in order to make himself appear important he said to him, "I
have a daughter who can spin straw into gold."
Apparently millers aren't chosen for their brains.
But kings sometimes are, and this one was no slouch. So he
casually said "Well, it so happens that is an art which pleases me
well. If your daughter is as clever as you say, bring her
to-morrow to my palace, and I will put her to the test. If she pleases
me, there may be reward in it for you."
Now these days, of course, when a politician says something like that,
red flags go up and radar beeps and all manner of doubts and worries
spring up. "If she pleases me" and "May be reward" are both
pretty vague, and provide lots of wiggle room.
But, back then, politicians had more power, and the miller knew that if
he didn't bring his daughter as instructed, he might very well lose his
head. And he was smart enough to know that it's very difficult to mill
wheat without one's head.
And so, the next day, when the girl was brought to the king, he took
her into a room which was quite full of straw, gave her a
spinning-wheel and a reel, and said, "Now set to work, and if by
to-morrow morning early you have not spun this straw into gold during
the night, I must surely put you to death, comely as you are. It isn't
personal. It's just the way this fairy tale will be told in years to
Thereupon he himself locked up the room, and left her in it alone.
So there sat the poor miller's daughter, whose name was Millie, by the
way. Prior to this, her primary unhappiness in life had been that
her name was Millie Miller, and sometimes people made fun of her for
But now she had a real problem, and for the life of her could not tell
what to do, she had no idea how straw could be spun into gold, and she
grew more and more frightened, until at last she began to weep.
But all at once the door magically opened, and in came a little
man. He was most odd looking, being about four feet tall, with a
pointy chin, pointy nose and pointy ears, though you couldn't tell that
at first, because he had on a pointy hat that covered them. But
you get the point, pun intended. Anyway, he also had big,
luminous eyes, like those of a lemur. He wore a green jerkin with
brown pants and, had he been in a forest, might have fit right
in. But in a room full of yellow straw, he stood out most
ridiculously. Of course Millie, in her very best pink dress
wasn't much better, but then this tale isn't about fashion sense, so
let's move on.
"Hello," said the little man. "I couldn't help but hear you
weeping. Whatever is it that makes you so sad?"
"Alas," answered the girl, "I have to spin straw into gold, and I do
not know how to do it. But if I can't do it, the king will have my
"I can do it, said the little fellow. "What will you give me if I
do it for you?"
"I have nothing of value," said the girl sadly.
"That all depends on how you value things," said the man. "For example,
I'd value a few sweet kisses from your ruby lips quite a lot.
"Really?" asked Millie. "Why?"
"Surely you know," said the little man, touching the front of his pants.
"Surely I would not," said Millie. "I have never kissed anyone
except my Pappa on the cheek at bedtime."
"I see," said the midget. "Well, believe me when I tell you that
for five kisses I'll spin this straw into gold for you."
And so it was that Millie had her first experience with kisses of the
Now ont might think that a creature with so many points on his body,
would not be much fun to kiss. But the fact was that the little
man's lips were warm and loose when he pressed them to Millie's, and it
felt quite lovely to her. He held the kiss for quite a while, not
length of the kisses having been negotiated. And by the third
kiss, when his not so sharp tougue sought entrance to her mouth, she
was quite breathless and allowed it. She shuddered with the experience
and wondered why someting so simple could make her feel so complicated.
But eventually the kisses were finished, which was a good thing,
because Millie was so weak she had to rest upon the straw, while the
little man seated himself in front of the wheel. Then with a
whirr, whirr, whirr, the wheel spun and in no time the reel was full of
glistening, glimmering gold thread. Then he put another reel on,
and whirr, whirr, whirr, three times round, and the second was full
too. And so it went on until the morning, when all the straw was spun,
and all the reels were full of gold.
Millie was so pleased she gave the funny little man five more kisses.
Thus it was that, when the king arrived, Millie was panting and
flushed, which of course the king thought was caused by her exertions
at the loom. And when he saw the gold he was astonished and
But of course he was a politician, and politicians are never happy with
what they have, but must always have more and more and more. So
he had Millie Miller taken into another room, this one much larger,
which was also full of straw, and he commanded her to spin that into
gold, also in one night if she valued her life.
Of course Millie knew not how to help herself, and was crying, when the
door opened again, and the little man appeared.
He'd already been there, done that and was, in fact, wearing that T
shirt, which said "I take straw for a spin sometimes."
"What will you give me tonight?" he asked.
"I have more kisses," said Millie hopefully.
"I desire more than mere kisses this night," said the man.
"What else is there?" asked the innocent girl.
"I wish to sup at the tender, pink nipples of your large and no doubt
soft breasts," he said quite cheekily.
Millie blinked, and then frowned. "But you are not a babe, nor am
I a mother. There is no milk in my breasts!"
"Trust me," said the man. "I'm magic, remember?"
"Oh," said Millie. "Of course."
And thus it came to pass that the top of Millie's pink peasant blouse
was pulled gently down her arms, exposing her breasts, with nipples
that were, in fact, shockingly pink.
And the little man approached and his lips pooched and he captured a
bud, pulling gently, while his fingers flickered in the air beside her
Millie was most amazed to become aware of her nipple as though it were
a major part of her body, like an arm or leg. In fact, it almost
felt like she could wiggle that nipple. She watched in awe as the
little man's lips slipped off the pink skin and she saw that her nipple
had elongated almost an inch! Further, tiny streams of pure white
exploded from the nipple in different directions!
"Mustn't waste any," sighed the man, and he leaned in to suck,
swallowing loudly and repeatedly.
Millie looked at the other breast, and watched that nipple grown and
grow. Then beads of white appeared.
"What have you done to me?" she cried, reaching to touch what was
Rather than answer, the little man simply changed nipples.
Now Millie felt the thrills and chills of being a recipient of nipple
love, something new and astonishingly pleasant. It was strange
too, in that it made her itch between her legs, at a spot that was at
least a foot and a half distant from the nipple being sucked. She
got more and more agitated as he continued to nurse, until she was
quite sure something else amazing and shocking was about to happen.
But then he stopped. He stood back and, with hot eyes, opened the
front of his brown pants. Something leapt out toward Millie and
she leaned back, sure an animal of some sort was attacking her.
But then it stopped and she realized with something akin to fascinated
horror, that it was his penis. She had seen her father's penis
when he relieved himself out behind the mill, but this one was much
larger and much longer and much darker and just plain scary for some
"Just a sec," panted the little man, as his two hands came to stroke
the sides of his mammoth member. Soon he grimaced and a stream of
liquid gold erupted from the tip of his peter. It splatted on the
side of the spinning wheel, which shimmered and turned to gold before
Millie's startled eyes.
"I know piss is golden," said Millie, in a soft voice. "But that
takes things to ridiculous lengths."
"It's not a ridiculous length at all," sighed the little man.
"Among my kind my tallywhacker is quite normal."
"I meant the turning things to gold thing," she said.
"Oh." He sat down on the now golden stool of the now golden
spinning wheel. "Well, for one thing, it isn't piss. And for
another, it turns out you need that particular skill now, so don't
And with that the little man again began to turn the wheel.
Millie watched, and wanted to ask what he meant when he said that
golden stream wasn't piss. What else could it have been?
But she didn't want to disturb him, for ther ewas indeed a lot of straw
in the room.
But she needn't have worried, because by morning had spun all the straw
into glittering gold.
Millie was delighted, and to show her delight she insisted on five hot
kisses before baring her bounteous breasts again for him to suckle most
lasviciously. And this time, when she felt like she was about to
explode into tiny fragments, she panted "Please do not stop yet. Suck
on suckah!" And she was rewarded with her very first orgasm,
which left her lying all but lifeless upon the floor, next to the
golden loom, which is where the king found her when he came to see what
Of course the king rejoiced beyond measure at the sight of all that
gold, and was amazed no end at the goldent loom, but of course he was
much too greedy to be satisfied with a beautiful girl, whose nipples
were poking most aluringly through the pink cloth of her peasant
blouse, to say nothing of another room full of gold, and even a golden
So of course he had Millie taken to yet another larger room, with still
more straw in it. His greed having been at least a little
assuaged, though, this time he didn't threaten her. Instead he
said "You must spin this into gold too, in the course of this night,
but if you succeed, you shall be my wife."
It's important to note here that he didn't desire her as a wife because
she was beautiful, or shapely. He was blinded by greed. But he
figured that even if all she was was a miller's daughter, with talent
like that he could have all the gold his heart desired.
This time, when the king shut and locked the door, Millie expected the
little man to appear. She even had her top down when he arrived.
"Aha!" he said, grinning. "I see you are ready to play the game again."
"And what have you to add to the game, such that I may secure your aid
in turning all this straw into gold?" she asked, looking at him through
"Take that dress off and we shall see what we shall see," he said,
What she saw, once she was naked, was that enormous prick again.
Not only that, she saw the rest of his naked body too. And all
his skin was as nut brown as the skin of that ogre-like organ.
But everything he'd ever done to her thus far had been beyond
pleasureable, so she decided not to worry.
She didn't worry when the little man started kissing her again, with
long, hot kisses.
She didn't worry when the little man sucked at her leaking breasts
again, and the thrills shot through her.
She didn't worry when she felt a sudden pressure between her legs
either. At least until she stopped kissing him and looked down to
see half of that cudgle-cock stuffed inside her.
"You can't put that in me!" she gasped.
"Too late," he cackled. "It's already there."
"But I'm a virgin!" she cried.
"You were a virgin," huffed the little man.
"But the kind said he'd marry me if I turned all this to gold!" she
wailed. He'll never marry me if I'm not a virgin!"
"The king hasn't had a virgin since he was fifteen," panted the
man. "He won't know the difference. Just relax, so I can get the
rest in. You'll like it. I promise."
"All right," moaned Millie, "but you'd better not pee in me and turn me
into gold. I'll be very cross if you do."
"It doesn't effect humans like it does other things," he grumbled.
"I'll prove it to you in must a minute."
And with that the little man lurched forward. Millie groaned as
the rest of his bodacious boner slid into her. She couldn't
believe it had fit in her, a belief that was bulwarked by the fact that
her belly bulged where the prodicious prick pressed outward.
But she paid no more attention to that after the first time he pulled
out and then slithered back in, scraping her little clitty like a two
foot long rasp on a six inch piece of wood. She was much too busy
having orgasmsd after that to worry about bulging bellies or stretched
slits or anything else that might be expressed with alliteration.
And the creature, it turned out, had a lot of energy for such a minimal
man, for he kept going and going and going, just like the Energizer
Bunny, had it been invented yet, until with a great groan he slammed in
one last time and unleashed a torrent of magical spunk deep inside
Then, after resting a bit, he sat at the wheel and started turning
straw into gold.
Half an hour later, Millie convinced him he needed a break. She offered
her body as his mattress.
"Be careful what you ask for," he said, looking up at her. "Once
is once, but too much of a good thing can have consequences."
"All I know is that I crave the feeling you have teased me with," she
said, spreading her legs and holding out her arms to him.
"Can you say hussy?" he asked, licking his lips.
"If that will get you back inside me," she said saucily.
And so he fucked her again.
And, heedless of his warnings, she asked for it six or seven more times
that night, not knowing that the first time he fertilized her, he
simply increased her human fertility, so that she would have many, many
babies during her life ... or that the second time he soaked her in his
golden nectar, he imbued in her an essence that no man could
resist. She didn't think to ask what would happen if she did it
again and again, and by the time she finally lay spent and sated on the
few remaining wisps of straw she wasn't aware of the invisible aura
around her, or the tiny, but fully formed baby that resided in her womb.
And so it was that when the king came to the room, he was bedazzled.
But not by the gold.
Rather, he took one look at Millie and threw off his clothes, ripped
hers away, and mated with her until he fell senseless.
Millie, free for the first time in days, went looking for something to
eat, and something to wear. She ran into a squire, who had been
sent to his knight's rooms to retrieve something. The boy took
one look at Millie and promptly forgot his mission. Within a
trice his prick was out and he was reaching for her. She was so
surprised that he took her down before she could react, and gasped as
she was filled with her third penetrating penis. She complained
as her naked backside was scraped along the floor, but the lad paid her
no mind, rutting in her mindlessly until he spewed.
Then he was up and away, leaving poor Millie sprawled on the
floor. She didn't even make it to her feet before a chambermaid
found her and promptly fell to feast on her slippery slit.
"Help!" yelped Millie. "Sombody help me!"
But no one helped her. Every human being she saw was so instantly
smitten with her that it took her four hours to make it halfway through
the castle to where she was able to find a storage room to lock herself
She lay, bedraggled and sperm-soaked, wet with the sweat of exertion,
both that caused in trying to flee, and that caused by fucking back as
three knights, the blacksmith and four more chambermaids waylaid her
and supped or fucked her irrisistible loins.
"Whatever shall I do?" she moaned.
"I warned you," said a voice she knew quite well. It was the little man.
"You did this to me!" she barked.
"No, you did it to yourself," he said.
"Well undo it!" she demanded. "I can't get anything done at all."
"What will you give me?" he asked quietly.
"I have no more innocence to give," she said, shaking her head.
"You have taken it all."
"Then you must give to me your firstborn child," he said.
"What?" Millie wondered at his request. Like all young women she
was quite sure she would never become pregnant. Other women got
pregnant. Not her. "Done!" she said quickly.
The little man smiled, bowed and then pulled out his penis again.
"Oh no," she moaned. "I thought I'd always love fucking, but I'm
plumb worn out from it now."
"We'll use a different hole today," he said, and nudged her lips with
the tip of his spike.
We won't go into the ins and outs of Millie's attempt to keep that
thing out of her mouth. Suffice it to say there were only ins
anyway. But once she found out sucking it was fun, the invisible
glow around her began to fade. The little man watched her aura closely
and finally said "Stop!"
"Do I have to?" she whined.
"Unless you want everyone to flee from you in disgust, I recommend you
stop now," he said.
Remembering that his warnings were to be taken seriously, she stopped.
He disappeared, and she carefully ventured out into the hall. A
scullion boy saw her and they both froze.
"Yer nekked!" he squeaked.
"I'm looking for clothes," she said.
To her everlasting relief he simply beckoned and led her away.
Life was good for Millie. The king doted on her. He no
longer fucked himself senseless. She found, to her amazement and
delight that her belly swelled within a month of marrying the king.
She'd already forgotten about the little man and her pledge. She
should have remembered, because her pregnancy proceeded with startling
rapidity. By the time she was four months along, she looked eight, and
the midwives followed her around constantly.
And then the day arrived, four months and thirteen days to the day
since she became the queen. There were some whispers about it,
but everyone had been at the wedding, and everyone had admired the slim
beauty the king had chosen. There was no freaking way she'd been five
months pregnant when she walked down the aisle.
So when the king crowed that it was his royal seed that had done the
deed, everybody just nodded. More than a few serving girls looked
worriedly at their own bellies, and one lady in waiting decided she
needed to take the air at their summer villa, even though it weasn't
Now you might expect that a funny sharp-chinned baby might be the
result of the mere ten minutes it took for Millie to push the baby
out. But the babe looked entirely human, and wholely normal, pink
and fat, with rosy cheeks.
It wasn't until the baby took its first sip at Millie's elongated,
spurting nipple that she thought about the little man. And, as if
thinking about him summoned him, there he was, in one corner of the
"You have done well. I shall take my son now," he said.
"Your son? No! He is heir to the throne!" she said.
"We had an agreement," he said. "A deal is a deal."
"But what will I tell people? Everyone knows I had a baby. What
will they say when I cannot produce one?"
"That is not my problem," he said, holding out his arms.
"No! There must be something else I can do to assuage your desires."
He smiled. This was a game he had played before ... and he loved
"Tell you what," he said. "I will give you three days time to find out
my name. If you do, you shall keep our child. If not, then you
must surrender him to me."
Well, the queen had no choice but to accept the challenge, and so she
did. She thought the whole night of all the names that she had
ever heard, and she sent a messenger over the country to inquire, far
and wide, for any other names that there might be.
When the father of her child came the next day, she began with Caspar,
Melchior, Malthazar, and said all the names she knew, one after
another, but to every one the little man said, "That is not my name."
On the second day she had inquiries made in the neighborhood as to the
names of the people there, and she repeated to the spinner of gold the
most uncommon and curious.
"Perhaps your name is Shortribs, or Sheepshanks, or Laceleg," she said,
but he always answered, "Wrong! That is not my name."
Now, on the third day the messenger came back again. He looked sad, but
"My queen," he said, bowing low. "I have not been able to find a single
new name, but as I came to a high mountain at the end of the forest,
where the fox and the hare bid each other good night, there I saw a
little house, and before the house a fire was burning, and round about
the fire quite a ridiculous little man was jumping. He had a pointy
chin, and pointy nose, and I'd wager he had pointy ears, except that I
couldn't see them because of his pointy hat. He hopped upon one leg,
and shouted: "To-day I bake, to-morrow brew, the next I'll have my
child from you. He's all I got, can't fuck your slot, tis sad, but you
married the king. But I'll win the game, for you don't know my
name, is Rumpelstiltskin for true."
Well, you may imagine how glad the queen was when she heard the name.
And, truth to tell, she was flattered that the little man missed
her. Tis true that a maiden never forgets her first fuck.
But all is fair in love and war, so when soon afterwards the little man
came in, and asked, "Now, mistress queen, your time is up. What is my
At first she said, "Is your name Conrad?"
"No." He grinned.
"Is your name Harry?"
"No." He held out his hands.
"Perhaps your name is Rumpelstiltskin?"
Rumpelstiltskin's face turned pale. He had never lost this game!
How could this be?
"Some magic is at work here!" he bawled. "Not fair! Not fair!"
"You used magic to bring me to this place," she reminded him.
"But he's my son?" moaned the sprite, for a sprite indeed he was, of
the wood sprite variety.
"Could he not be your nephew?" she asked, undoing the buttons on her
dress. She pulled it apart to display milky white breasts with
thrusting, pink nipples.
"Could you not come visit him whenever you wished? Or even live here in
"You know what happens when I seed your belly," growled the forest
"And I know what happens when I suck at your stem," she smiled sweetly.
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