Thanksgiving With Dick And Jane - A Randy Reader

by Lubrican

Author's note: It might be helpful for you to know that the Dick and Jane Randy Readers do not consist of a running narrative about their lives. Each story is independent of the others. If it helps further, you may consider them Dick and Jane stories from alternate dimensions. Dick is, after all, going to grow up to become an expert in string theory. At least in one of those dimensions. That might be why, in that dimension, Jane prefers Spot. But that's another story.

See Dick?

See Dick smiling?

Smile, Dick, smile!

Dick is smiling because it's almost Thanksgiving, and every year at Thanksgiving he gets to see his Uncle Bob and Aunt Jill.

Dick loves to see his aunt and uncle.

Why does Dick love to see them?

Because Dick loves to stare at Aunt Jill's breasts. Aunt Jill has big, firm breasts, and Dick is a horny teenager.

And sometimes Aunt Jill wears filmy, little babydoll pajamas to bed. Dick has stayed up before, bent over for hours, peeping through the keyhole in his door, just to see Aunt Jill walk from the bathroom to the guest bedroom in those filmy, little babydoll pajamas.

All that gives Dick a big hardon.

What's a hardon?

Well the boys reading this already know. That's when a boy's penis gets hard and long. It used to be called a hard-long, but that's hard to say. If you don't believe me just try and say that out loud ten times fast.

I told you so. So it just got shortened to hard-on.

What do you do with a hardon, you ask?

Well, you can put some lard on your hardon and rub it in really good until some different looking lard comes out of your hardon, at which point it won't be hard or long any more.

But let's not get all distracted by science, okay?

Dick isn't the only one excited about them coming for Thanksgiving.

See Jane?

See Jane smiling?

Smile, Jane, smile!

Jane is smiling because every time her aunt and uncle come for Thanksgiving she gets to sit on Uncle Bob's lap and get hugs from him. Jane loves hugs from Uncle Bob. His lap is always very lumpy, but Jane doesn't mind. His lump fits perfectly between her long teenage legs, and feels really good pushing against her down there.

Why does it feel good pushing against her down there?

Well, that's more science. Maybe we'll get to that later.

See Dick and Jane's mommy and daddy? See how flushed Mommy is? See how full the front of Daddy's pants look?

That's because they're looking out the window, watching Uncle Bob and Aunt Jill get out of their car.

They're here! Yay!

Why are mommy and daddy so excited?

Hear Daddy saying "Did you get a new tape? I can't wait to make another video."

That must be why they're so excited.

They have a new, blank video tape, and they want to make a new home movie with Aunt Jill and Uncle Bob!

I bet making movies is fun! Don't you? If it wasn't fun, then why would so many people do it?

See Uncle Bob and Aunt Jill come inside?

See Uncle Bob hug and kiss Mommy? They're glad to see each other.

See Daddy hug and kiss Aunt Jill? They're glad to see each other too.

Kiss, kiss, kiss!

Just look at those silly adults! They think they're dogs or something. See them licking each other's mouths? How silly. I hope they don't start barking at each other.

See Dick and Jane?

See how excited they are to see Uncle Bob and Aunt Jill?

See how they come running and wiggle their way between the two pairs of hugging and kissing adults?

Run, Dick, Run!

Wiggle, Jane, wiggle!

Dick and Jane want their own hugs and kisses. It's only fair.

See Jane rubbing herself all over Uncle Bob's front as she kisses him. She must really like her Uncle Bob.

Oh no! Uncle Bob thinks he's a dog again!

Oh well. Lick, Uncle Bob, lick!

See Dick hugging Aunt Jill and pressing his chest hard against those big, soft breasts he likes so much. See Aunt Jill rub her lower half against his lower half as she tells him how much he's grown in a year. That's called balance in nature. He rubs high and she rubs low, so everything evens out.

Boy! I just can't keep from talking about science, can I?

See Dick and Jane in the hallway.

What are they doing?

They are listening. That's what they're doing.

We must be very quiet.

What are they listening to?

Well, about an hour ago, Mommy and Daddy took Aunt Jill and Uncle Bob into the guest bedroom, to show it to them and help them put away the clothes in their suitcases. They closed the door and locked it too.

I wonder why they did that? Maybe Aunt Jill and Uncle Bob brought surprise presents for Dick and Jane, and Mommy and Daddy want to make sure the teens don't accidentally find out.

And why did Daddy take the video camera and tripod in there with them? Maybe they're going to make a movie of how happy Dick and Jane are when they get their presents, and want to teach Uncle Bob or Aunt Jill how to work the camera.

You think?

But wait! Now there are strange noises coming through the door to the guest bedroom. Rhythmic noises. Like squeaky bed springs when someone is jumping on the bed. And moans. Like when someone has a stomach ache.

Hear Dick say "I think they're jumping on the bed!"

Hear Jane say "I don't think so. That's not allowed."

Isn't that typical? Teenaged siblings never seem to agree on anything, do they?

Hear Dick say "It sounds like Aunt Jill has a stomach ache in there."

Hear Jane say "I bet she got car sick on the way here. Wanna go get some cookies while nobody's watching?"

Isn't that typical too? Teenagers are always eager to do something they're not supposed to do.

Hear Uncle Bob through the door, saying "I'm cumming!" kind of loudly?

Of course you don't. That's because it's our job to stay with Dick and Jane, and they're in the kitchen, sneaking cookies.

Besides, Uncle Bob is clearly confused. How could he be coming when he's already here?

Hear Daddy saying "Oh fuck, I'm getting my cookies!"?

Of course you don't. We're still in the kitchen, where Dick and Jane are wiping up cookie crumbs from the counter.

Wait!

How can Daddy be getting cookies when he's not even in the kitchen?

I'm so confused!

See how dark it is outside. That's because it's nighttime.

See Jane. It's almost bedtime and she's all fresh and clean from her shower.

You can tell it's almost bedtime because she's wearing her pajamas.

Daddy got her "big girl" pajamas when she turned sixteen.

Well how about that? They look just like Aunt Jill's pajamas!

And why not? Aunt Jill is certainly a big girl!

See Jane sit on Uncle Bob's lap to kiss him good night.

See her wiggle on his lap.

Wiggle, Jane, wiggle!

That's because his lap is lumpy, like I told you about already.

Hear Jane ask Uncle Bob to tell her a bedtime story.

See Uncle Bob smile. He's so happy his niece likes him and wants to spend quality time with him.

Hear Uncle Bob tell her he'll take her to her bedroom and tuck in her while telling her a long bedtime story.

Wait!

That sounded funny. Tuck in her?

I bet he meant "tuck her in." It was probably just a slip of the tongue because he's so excited about telling her a story.

How lucky Jane is to have a caring uncle who will spend quality time with her.

See Aunt Jill. She's all dressed for bed in her big girl pajamas too. She's coming out of the guest bedroom and walking down the hall.

Where is she going?

Probably to the kitchen to get a drink of water.

See the bathroom door open. Dick has just taken his bedtime shower and is coming out to go to his room.

Dick doesn't wear pajamas. He just wears a pair of jockey shorts to sleep in.

See Aunt Jill bump into Dick as he comes out of the bathroom. See them surprise each other.

Surprise!

What's that Aunt Jill is asking Dick?

"Is that a pistol in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?"

What a funny thing to say to a teenaged boy dressed only in bulging briefs.

Uh oh.

Dick's briefs are bulging. We know what that means.

Dick has a hardon!

Right in front of his Aunt Jill!

I bet that's because he can see those big, soft breasts through the filmy fabric of her babydoll pajamas.

But Dick is a smart boy.

Hear him say "What pocket?"

Aunt Jill must be confused by bumping into him. See her slide her hand into the waistband of his bulging briefs. She thinks they are a pocket! How silly!

Dick must know she is confused. See him take her to his bedroom. I bet he's going to help her lie down on his bed to rest a while, so she can recover from her being-bumped-into episode.

How lucky Aunt Jill is to have a nephew who cares about her health and welfare so much.

See Uncle Bob.

He's sitting on the edge of Jane's bed.

See Jane.

She's lying on her back on top of the covers.

I thought Uncle Bob was going to tuck her in!

I bet she's cold in those jammies. You can see right through them!

And her nipples are all stiff and turgid.

That happens when nipples get cold. I could explain it, but that's more science.

Hear the story he's telling her. It's about Little Red Riding Hood and the Big Bad Wolf.

I love that story, don't you?

See Uncle Bob wiping his forehead with the back of his hand.

Hear him complaining that it's too hot in the bedroom.

That must be why he's stripping down to his boxers.

See him helping Jane strip down to her panties.

Now we understand why Uncle Bob didn't tuck her in.

He must be worried she'll get overheated too.

What's Jane asking him?

"What is Little Red Riding Hood afraid the Big Bad Wolf will do to her?"

Hear Uncle Bob saying he'll show her.

Jane is so lucky to have such an interested and helpful uncle.

See Uncle Bob lean over Jane.

Hear Jane say "What big lips you have, Uncle Bob!"

Hear Uncle Bob say "The better to kiss you with, my dear."

See him demonstrating how the wolf would kiss Little Red.

Hear Uncle Bob say "And the better to suck your luscious big girl nipples with, my dear!"

See him showing her how the wolf would suck Miss Hood's nipples until they were even longer and harder than before.

Who would have thought a warm sucking mouth would affect nipples the same way cold does?

Hear Uncle Bob say "And the better to eat your tasty teen twat with!"

See Uncle Bob taking off Jane's panties!

See Uncle Bob shove his big face, with those big lips, right up against Jane's sixteen-year-old pussy!

Oh my! Uncle Bob hasn't shaved since morning! His stubble must be very prickly!

I bet that's why Jane is writhing around and squealing so much.

Hear Jane squealing about how she's cumming?

I'm not surprised. Uncle Bob was confused earlier, in the guest bedroom, while he was putting clothes away. And Jane has some of Uncle Bob's genetic material in her body. So it's understandable how she can be confused in the same way he was.

Sorry. More science. * sigh *

What's Uncle Bob doing now?

He's taking his boxers off! He must still be hot.

Uh oh.

Uncle Bob has a big boner. That's another name for hardon.

Will Jane notice it?

If she does will she be embarrassed?

I sure would be if I saw my uncle's big boner.

But then I'm a man, so maybe that's different.

Uh oh.

She did notice!

Hear Jane say "Uncle Bob! What a big boner you have!"

Hear Uncle Bob say "The better to fuck you with, my dear!"

Uncle Bob sure knows how to tell a story, doesn't he! He's already teaching Jane a new word: Fuck!

Hear Jane express some concern.

Hear her say "Gee whiz, Uncle Bob. It's a big boner. Is it going to hurt when you fuck me with it?"

Hear Uncle Bob express amazement.

Hear him ask "Am I to understand you already know the meaning of the word 'fuck'?"

See Jane nodding vigorously to indicate she does?

Jane is good at non-verbal communication.

Hear Uncle Bob saying "So you're on the pill?"

See Jane shaking her head vigorously to indicate she is not?

Jane is so good at non-verbal communication!

Hear Uncle Bob being curious about his niece's welfare.

"Have you been letting those pimply faced boys fuck that sweet little pussy of yours, Jane?"

Hear Jane augment her non-verbal communication with verbal communication. "No way, Uncle Bob. I'm not allowed to fuck. At least I don't think I'm allowed to fuck. I haven't actually asked if I'm allowed, though.”

Hear Uncle Bob caring about whether or not Jane's physical health is normal "So when was your last period?"

See Jane rise above being offended by an extended family member asking extremely personal questions.

Hear her say "About two weeks ago ... why?"

See Uncle Bob get all flushed and even more excited.

Hear him say "No reason," and notch the tip of his big adult prick in the opening of Jane's tight, teen pussy.

Hear Uncle Bob warn Jane that, while sometimes life can be painful, there is always hope.

"This might hurt for just a little bit, but I promise it will feel really good right after that."

Hear Jane being brave.

"Okay, Uncle Bob, I know you love me and I trust you."

This is a wonderful example of how a man can say one thing, and a woman can hear another. But that is psychology, which is sort of another branch of science, so we'll just move along.

See Uncle Bob sweating.

Sweat, Uncle Bob, sweat!

See Uncle Bob heave.

Heave, Uncle Bob, heave!

See Uncle Bob shove.

Shove, Uncle Bob, shove!

See his big old boner disappear inside Jane's tight, teen pussy!

It's like magic!

See a tear form in the corner of Jane’s right eye? Poor, brave Jane.

See Uncle Bob's curly brown pubic hairs mesh with Jane's curly blonde ones.

I hope they don't get caught, like Velcro. They would be stuck like that forever!

Ouch!

Hear me heave a big sigh of relief. Whew!

That's because Uncle Bob just pulled his big, knobby boner almost out of Jane. Their pubic hair didn't get caught! Maybe he was worried about that too.

See Uncle Bob ram his long hardon back into Jane again. He seems to think there is some of his hardon still outside of her. Look at him push hard and wiggle back and forth!

I don't think Jane is feeling any more pain. See her smiling.

Smile, Jane, smile!

See her hugging her uncle tightly.

Hug, Jane, hug!

I think she's forgiven him for the pain he caused when he shoved that big thing inside her.

What a wonderful, forgiving girl Jane is.

See the evidence of how old people get confused easily. See Uncle Bob pulling his boner almost out of Jane and then shoving it back in, over and over. He can't make up his mind about whether he wants to have it in her or not!

See Jane trying to be helpful to the poor older man. See her starting to throw her pelvis up at him as Uncle Bob pushes into her pussy. See how she relaxes and lets her body fall when he is taking it out of her.

Wait! I just thought of something! Didn't Uncle Bob say he was going to fuck Jane?

Could this be fucking?

I bet it is!

Fuck, Uncle Bob! Fuck!

Fuck back, Jane! Fuck back!

Uh oh.

It sounds like maybe Uncle Bob is hurting Jane again. Hear Jane starting to whine and groan.

Careful, Uncle Bob!

Hear Uncle Bob being confused even more. Hear him saying "Cum for me sweet little Jane. Cum on my hard prick!"

Poor Uncle Bob. He keeps getting confused between coming places and already being places. As we can clearly see, Jane is already right there under him. And his big long boner is clearly in her pussy.

Now it's not.

Now it is.

Now it's not.

Now it is.

Boy, I'm getting dizzy!

Maybe he only said that to teach her another new word.

Prick!

What a funny thing to call something that isn't sharp.

Then again, it certainly did poke inside Jane. So maybe it's a pretty good word after all.

Hear Jane sound like she's dying. All that groaning and screaming!

But she's not dying. I can tell.

Hear Jane yelling how much she loves fucking with Uncle Bob. Nobody loves dying, so I don't think she's dying.

Hear Uncle Bob groan that he's going to shoot.

Poor, confused Uncle Bob. Now he thinks he's a gun. Or maybe an arrow. Who knows?

Hear Uncle Bob say "I'm gonna fertilize sweet Janie!"

Poor, confused Uncle Bob. Now he thinks Jane is a plant.

See Uncle Bob get so confused he has a seizure! See him go all stiff! See him shake and shiver! What if he stays like that, with his big prick buried deep inside Jane? Will she be able to crawl out from under him and go get help?

Wow! Now Uncle Bob is so mentally unbalanced that he thinks he lives in New Zealand!

How do I know?

Hear him say "I'm knocking up my niece!"

In New Zealand when you "knock somebody up" it means you go to their door in the morning and knock on it to get them out of bed. You knock, and they get up, so it's called knocking them up. It's easy to understand.

Well, Jane is in bed, I suppose.

I bet Uncle Bob wants her to get out of bed and go get some help for him.

Though his seizure does seem to be getting a lot better.

See Uncle Bob roll off of Jane and land on his back, all limp and out of breath. Whew! We were so worried that his seizure might be permanent, but now we know it's not. I'm so glad!

See Jane lying there all limp too. See the silly smile on her face.

What's that seeping out of her pussy lips?

By golly, it looks just like the lard that comes out of your hardon when you put lard on the outside and rub it in really good!

I bet that's what happened.

I bet Jane had lard in her pussy, and when she rubbed Uncle Bob's hardon with her pussy it got soft.

See how handy fucking can be?

When you fuck you don't have to rub lard on your own hardon!

See Aunt Jill.

It must be hot in Dick's bedroom too. She's taken off all of her pajamas except the panties.

See Dick.

See Dick squirm.

Squirm, Dick, squirm!

Dick can't decide where to look, so his eyes are bouncing around like marbles in a tin can!

See Aunt Jill being concerned about Dick? Hear her telling him he shouldn't wear jockey shorts because it might affect his virility in a negative way?

What's virility? These adults sure are full of new words!

See her sliding his jockey shorts down. She's making sure his virility stays good. Whatever virility is.

Uh oh.

I was right.

Dick has a boner.

See Aunt Jill be completely unembarrassed about him having a boner in front of her. Dick is so lucky to have an aunt who will try to make him feel comfortable in uncomfortable situations.

Hear Aunt Jill asking an odd question "You got a raincoat for that monster?"

Uh oh. Aunt Jill is an older woman too. Could she be confused like her husband?

Hear Dick try to help her confusion by saying "It's not raining in here, Aunt Jill."

Hear Aunt Jill laughing happily. Why is she so happy?

Oh my! Aunt Jill is even more confused than I thought. She's putting her mouth on Dick's big hardon! She's sucking on it!

Didn't she just see him coming out of the bathroom?

Doesn't she know he just took a shower?

Why is she trying to get his penis all clean then?

Seizures must be hereditary in this family. See Dick having one right now?

See how helpful Aunt Jill is, holding on to his bottom and helping him keep standing up while he has his seizure. That way he doesn't fall down and hurt himself.

Dick is so lucky to have such an understanding and helpful aunt!

See Aunt Jill helping Dick get into bed so he can recover from his seizure. Now isn't that interesting? That seizure didn't seem to bother his hardon at all. It's still nice and long and hard. And very clean too.

What is Aunt Jill saying? She loves the virility of youth? Well we already knew how concerned she was about this youth's virility, so we're not surprised, now are we.

See Aunt Jill taking off her panties and climbing on top of Dick.

I bet she's afraid he'll have another seizure. He might thrash and fall and hurt himself, so she's going to sit on top of him and keep him safe. And I bet she doesn't want the lace of her panties to scratch Dick's tender skin.

What a wonderful aunt Jill is!

What's that Aunt Jill is saying? "The last load was a gusher. I hope you don't put a bun in my oven."

What in the world does that mean?

What load is she talking about? We didn't see her carry anything into Dick's bedroom.

What gusher is she talking about? There is no oil well in Dick's bedroom.

And how could he put anything in her oven. Her oven is at her house, which is far, far away!

Adults can be so puzzling sometimes!

Now what is Aunt Jill doing?

She's sliding Dick's boner up into her pussy!

Okay, I get it now. She's going sit on his boner, so that when he has another seizure her weight will keep her from sliding sideways while he flops and groans.

See Aunt Jill lean forward and tell Dick to put her nipple in his mouth.

Why would she do that?

I know, because I took first aid class. When someone has a seizure you can put something between his teeth so he doesn't bite his tongue.

How brave Aunt Jill is! I'm sure it will hurt if Dick bites her nipple while he's having a seizure, but she's willing to take the risk just so he won't bite his tongue!

It must be uncomfortable for poor Aunt Jill. See how she keeps moving forward and backward, trying to find a comfortable position? She's not having much luck, is she. Now she's even moaning! It sounds like her stomach ache has come back. But she can't get off of Dick because he's clearly about to have another seizure!

Oh my! There he goes. He's flopping around all over the place. He sounds so pitiful. But he doesn't appear to be biting his tongue. I bet that's why Aunt Jill is sitting up real tall now.

Look how fast she's going forward and back! It's amazing that she can move that fast! How uncomfortable the poor woman must be.

I was right. Aunt Jill is sobbing now. She sounds like she's dying.

Wait. Jane sounded like that in her bedroom too, but she wasn't dying. I think we need to watch a little longer, until we can understand this confusing input better.

I think Aunt Jill has finally found a comfortable position. She's sitting still now. Her head is hanging and she looks very relaxed. She's out of breath from keeping Dick safe.

I wish we could tell Aunt Jill how proud we are of her.

Hear Aunt Jill and Dick saying how much they love each other.

Well we already knew that, now didn't we.

Hear Aunt Jill saying how she's going to call Dick Old Faithful from now on.

Now that's just silly. Dick isn't old at all.

See Uncle Bob getting out of Jane's bed.

What's Uncle Bob doing?

He's telling Jane to lift her hips up so he can slide a pillow under her bottom.

How strange! Now she looks funny. That makes her tummy bulge upward!

Jane is a smart girl. Hear her notice the same thing? "Uncle Bob, that makes my tummy bulge upward and I look funny!"

Hear Uncle Bob give his niece good advice? "Darling, never worry about looking funny. The people who love you won't care, and nobody else matters. Besides, that cute belly isn't bulging very much ... not right now anyway."

Uncle Bob must be happy that he gave his niece good advice. He's chuckling happily.

See Aunt Jill getting out of Dick's bed.

She must be convinced Dick won't have another seizure.

How nice of her to make sure his penis is still nice and clean before she leaves. It's probably easier because it's not hard any more, and she can get the whole thing in her mouth now.

What's Aunt Jill saying as she tenderly kisses her nephew good night?

"I'd better go get a legitimate dose in me, just in case I catch from you."

Oh. I understand. She's worried she might catch a cold or something from Dick. She's probably going to go take some pills. That's called a dose of medicine.

See Uncle Bob in the kitchen, eating a peanut butter sandwich.

See Aunt Jill come in all dressed in her jammies again.

Hear Aunt Jill express happiness that he's keeping up his strength for the games to come.

What games?

We'll have to follow them and see. Maybe they're going to play Monopoly because they can't sleep.

See Aunt Jill go into the guest bedroom. Why is Uncle Bob still walking? Why is he going to mommy and daddy's room?

See Aunt Jill taking off her jammies again. She must still be hot.

Wait! Who's that in the guest bed?

It's Daddy!

And he's hot too!

Do all the men in this family have a boner?

Daddy sure isn't shy about having a boner in front of his sister. Not at all. Hear him express that by saying "Look what I have for you!"

Aunt Jill sure is a stickler for making sure boners are nice and clean. See her sucking Daddy's boner too?

See Daddy push her away and climb on top of her.

Wait. I know what's going to happen.

Daddy is going to fuck Aunt Jill!

See Uncle Bob go into Mommy and Daddy's bedroom. Oops! He must have gotten confused again.

Double Oops! Mommy is naked, lying on the bed!

I bet she didn't expect her brother-in-law to come in and see her that way.

She must be very embarrassed. Hear her say "Hurry, Bob, hurry!"

She wants him to go back into the hallway really fast, doesn't she.

I bet she doesn't know how confused he gets, though.

See Bob push down his boxers!

See Bob climb on top of Mommy!

Oh my gosh! Uncle Bob is fucking Mommy!

See Dick tiptoeing down the hall.

Where is Dick going?

Dick is going to the bathroom. After Aunt Jill fucked him and he had his seizure, then he had to piss like a Russian race horse.

Let's not follow him in and watch him piss, okay?

See Dick come out of the bathroom. I can tell he feels much better.

Time to go back to bed, Dick.

See Dick pause at his sister's door.

Uncle Bob left that door open! How careless of him.

See Dick stop and look into Jane's room.

Let's look in Jane's room too!

My goodness the moonlight is bright outside. See how plainly we can see Jane? She's still lying on top of that pillow, stark naked.

See Dick express concern for his sister's odd situation by asking why she's naked and why her butt is perched on a pillow like that.

See Jane practice not caring that she looks goofy, because she knows her brother is one of the people who loves her and nobody else matters.

Hear Jane explain what happened.

"Uncle Bob fucked me!"

Hear Dick express amazement.

"Aunt Jill fucked me too!"

Hear Jane gather peer data, by asking if Dick liked to fuck.

Hear Dick giving Jane feedback by telling her it was the best thing he'd ever felt.

Hear Jane supporting her brother's new found emotional experience by agreeing she loved fucking more than anything too.

See Dick's penis get all long and hard again.

Dick has another boner!

See Jane staring at Dick's boner.

See Jane making new connections in her brain, and understanding cause and effect.

"Do you want to fuck me with that boner?"

See Dick rewarding her thought processes.

"You bet I do!"

See Dick and Jane exert intelligent and thoughtful control over their behavior, as they discuss what to do about the pillow under Jane's bottom. Hear Jane be pragmatic.

"Take it out while you fuck me, and we'll put it back when we're finished. That way Uncle Bob will still be happy about making my belly bulge!

See Dick mount Jane.

See Dick and Jane practice lusty fucking!

Fuck, Dick and Jane, Fuck!

Hear the squeak of the bed Daddy is fucking Aunt Jane on? It sounds like "C" on the piano!

Hear the squeak of the bed Uncle Bob is fucking Mommy on? It sounds like "E" on the piano!

Hear the squeak of the bed Dick is fucking Jane on? It sounds like "G" on the piano!

Hear them all at the same time? If you know something about music you know they're making a C major chord!

Hear all those moans? It almost sounds like a choir humming along with a C major chord!

Did you know that the Italians call fucking "Making the music of love?"

Now you know why!

Well, boys and girls, I have a major hardon from watching all that fucking.

So I need to go rub some lard on my hardon to get rid of it.

Maybe I'll see you tomorrow and we can talk about all that science we didn't have time for today.

Bye, boys and girls, bye!

The End